I continue to be fascinated by MMA fighters and how much we as business leaders can learn from them. With each fight, they are put on display with interviews, press conferences, and video clips that document how they are training and what their mindset is. Then, that moment comes when all of their hard work is on display for the world to see if all of the preparation can measure up to their opponent's. It is one person against another. No one can help them. Whether they win or lose is the culmination of all of the events leading them to the Octagon, the muscle memory they have or have not built, and their ability to control their responses in the most grueling environment of fight or flight. (Actually, now that I think of it, I've had that feeling in the business world a few times!)
As we lead up to tomorrow evening's Fight Night, I am once again amazed at how powerful the mind is. There are two men who I believe will leave the Octagon disappointed with the outcome. They trained hard, believed they had a chance, and will do their best to show the world that they are worthy of the next steps... and they will very likely fail. Unintentionally Lose. Because they were not aware of the contradictions they were putting in their mind. So that we may learn from their mistakes, let's take a deeper look at how good intentions can make great people lose.
1. Incongruency and Winning to Achieve a Different State
To win requires 100% belief that you will win, that you will succeed at achieving your goal. Everyone has their reasons for wanting something. In Donald Cerrone's case, his "reason" or "purpose" is to honor the woman who has helped raise him - his grandma - by giving her his belt before she dies from her impending terminal illness. He imagines what that day will be like and almost tearfully shares in an emotional story how good it will be. "It will be nice.. it will be something she's been waiting for...almost like my OK for her to go, ya know?" And therein lies the conflict. By winning the belt, he believes that it will be a symbol that he has achieved what he needs to in order to be OK with her - one of the most important people in his life - to pass on from this life.
Congruency is about alignment. Every part of your being moving in the same direction. There is a part of Donald Cerrone who is not ready for his grandma to pass and that part will stay in conflict and unconsciously sabotage himself from achieving his goal to win a championship belt.
Another point to make is that he has not separated his goal from an emotional state. It is also a mistake people often make in developing goals. They say, "When I achieve this, I will finally be happy." "When I do this, I will finally feel successful." And in Donald Cerrone's case, when he wins the belt, he will be OK with his grandma's passing. The issue is that we have complete control of our emotional states 100% of the time. If someone wants to be happy, then they can be happy if they so choose to be. Same with feeling successful, and the same goes with feeling at peace with death. (More on being at peace with death in a future post.) Achieving a certain mental state is not a goal. You can have whatever mental or emotional state of mind that you want right at this moment if you so choose to have it. It's a choice, not a goal.
LESSON LEARNED: Be sure to separate goals from states. And be sure you want your goal with every molecule in body. You want all internal conflicts removed so you are moving full force towards your goals.
2. Visualizing Negatives and the Concept of "Being Owed Something"
In the show UFC Road to the Octagon: dos Anjos vs Cerrone , Nate Diaz shares one of the key things he has been doing to prepare for his fight with Michael Johnson-- visualizing negatives and what could go wrong so he can prepare for the possibilities of what might happen. Here's the problem, what you put in your mind will impact your results. Preparing for what could go wrong is important. It makes you flexible enough to respond appropriately to unplanned events. HOWEVER, focusing on the negative and visualizing that over and over will only yield to the same results and it won't be the results that you want. Every successful person in the world along with multiple performance studies say the same thing... Visualize what you want to happen. It's good to prepare for what could happen, but you have to combine that with visualizing the response you need to have in those situations... the response that will lead you to the result you want.
And we have all heard it before... "the world is not fair." It's your response to what you perceive as negatively occurring in the world that will influence your results. When Diaz goes into a fight with a chip on his shoulder, angry at the UFC for not giving him the attention that Connor McGregor has received, he's focused on a distraction. He isn't focusing on the results he has delivered or plans to deliver. He is focused on what he thinks he is owed... what he thinks is fair. How often in business have you caught yourself saying "it's not fair" or thinking how stupid your colleagues are or looking at a newly promoted leader in disbelief? What are you maintaining in your mind? It will absolutely come out in your language and how others perceive you... which will impact the results you have in your career.
LESSON LEARNED: Prepare for the unexpected and be sure you visualize yourself winning under every scenario. Keep your focus on getting the results you want and let go of any thoughts or beliefs of intangible debt. They are only distractions keeping you from what you want.
I wish all my readers much success and focus on intentionally winning!
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UPDATE: As I expected, Donald "Cowboy" Cerrone took a beating against the reigning champion Rafael Dos Anjos. He described his poor performance in his post-fight press conference as feeling like his whole day was off. He felt like he didn't "show up" to the fight. Imagine going through life completely unaware of the unconscious chains we have unintentionally setup in our minds.
As far as Nate Diaz is concerned, it does appear that while focusing on what could happen. He must have been visualizing how he could respond and win the fight. He also made sure to show his results this fight and surprising the majority of people with a big win. (Maybe he read my article... hehe). Big kudos to the real Nate Diaz for "showing up." Nice win!
Williamvads